Monty Python Dictionary































Abbos: (n). Derogatory term for Australian Natives. Members of the Philosophy Faculty at the University of Wallamalloo are forbidden to maltreat the Abbos – if there’s anybody watching.
Albatross: 1. (n) A web-footed bird, of the genus Diomedea, of which there are several species. They are the largest of sea birds, capable of long-continued flight, and are often seen at great distances from the land. They are found chiefly in the southern hemisphere. 

2. (n) A sea bird flavoured refreshment sold in cinemas by a person who may (or may not) be a woman. You do not get wafers with albatrosses.
Anarcho-Syndicalist Commune: (n) A settlement of people based upon common ownership of material goods, which have a tradition of self-government.


Bally: (adj.) Word used to intensify a statement – dated slang.
Blancmange: 1. (n) A white, sweet milk pudding thickened with cornstarch or gelatine and flavoured with vanilla or rum.
2. (n) An inhabitant of the planet Skyron
Blimey: (Interjection) An informal expression of surprise.
Bloke: (n) A man, often one who is considered to be ordinary.
Bloody: (adj.) (adv.) Used to emphasize an adjective, adverb or noun
Botty: (n) A childish term referring to the bottom.  Sometimes also shortened to "bot"
Bouzouki: (n) A long-necked stringed instrument of Greek origin that resembles a mandolin with a long fretted neck and usually pear-shaped body. Occasionally found played in cheese shops.
Brontosaurus: (n) A dinosaur that is thin at one end, much, much thicker in the middle and then thin again at the far end.
Bruce: (n) A common Australian name
Bugger: 1. (interjection) A swear word often used to express annoyance  

2. (n) A person who is annoying, silly or who you feel sympathy for, or a thing that is annoying or difficult to do 

3. (v) Slang e.g. Bugger off! = Go away.
Bum: (n) The part of the body that you sit on; your botty.
Burma: 1. (n) A mountainous republic in south-eastern Asia on the Bay of Bengal now known as Mynamar. 2. (adj.) Something to say when you panic and can't think of anything else to say.


Camp: (adj.) (of a man) behaving and dressing in a way that is similar to a woman and often intended to be noticed by others or, (of people or styles in general) intentionally artificial, usually in a way that is amusing
Camel spotting: (n) Pretty much what it sounds like – trying to spot camels to record their numbers.
Camel Spotter: (n) Someone who engages in Camel Spotting.
Cashectomy: (n) The total removal of all monies from the patient
Chap: (n) See "bloke"
Chartered Accountancy: (n) A terrible debilitating social disease
Chartered Accountant: (n) Member of a Chartered Institute of Accountants.
Clap\ the clap: (n) A slang term for gonorrhoea
Codger: (n) A man, esp. an old one who behaves strangely
Comfy chair: 1. (n) A chair that is comfortable to sit in. 2. (n) An instrument of torture used by the Spanish Inquisition.
Cor Blimey: (Interjection) A mild exclamation of surprise, derived from a corruption of the oath "God blind me"  Sometimes shortened to merely "Cor!"
Crackers: (adj.) Foolish, stupid or slightly mentally ill
Cretin: (n) Slang - A stupid person; an idiot.
Crikey: (interjection) An expression of surprise.


Daft: (adj.) Silly or stupid


Fag: 1. (n) British slang for a cigarette. 

2. (n) Something which is tiring and boring and which you do not want to do. (as in "I can't be fagged") 

3. (n) (at some large British private schools) a younger boy who has to do jobs for an older boy.
Fish License: (n) There is no such thing as a fish license.
Flower arranging: (n) First take a bunch of flowers. Pretty begonias, irises, freesias and cry-manthesums... then arrange them nicely in a vase.
Freemason: (n) A member of a large, old and powerful secret society for men in which all the members help each other and use secret signs to communicate with each other

Frog: (n) any of various largely aquatic leaping anuran amphibians (as ranids) that have slender bodies with smooth moist skin and strong long hind legs with webbed feet. Frogs are only crunchy if you don't remove the bones.


Git: (n) A person, esp. a man, considered to be unpleasant.
Gumby: (n) A character in Monty Python, often (but not exclusively) male.  They wear knitted sweater-vests, Wellington (gum/ rain) boots, knotted handkerchiefs upon their heads and glasses. Males tend to have moustaches. They have a tendency to talk loudly, break things, hit themselves in the head with blunt objects and be incredibly thick.


Hendon: (n) The Metropolitan Police Training Centre at Hendon, England. Where those recruits destined for high rank are trained. Traditionally a recruiting ground for Freemasons.
Hot Enough to Boil a Monkey's Bum: (phrase) Quite warm. Possibly used by the Australian Prime Minister to HM Queen Elizabeth II.


It's a Fair Cop: (phrase) Phrase used by criminals to indicate that they were fairly caught in the act
Incontinent: (adj.) Unable to control the excretion of urine or the contents of the bowels. (Why is this word listed? In The Life of Brian Bigus Dickus’s wife's name was Incontinentia Buttocks)


Kit: (n) Clothes. Commonly heard in phrases like: "Perhaps I should explain why he had no kit on”.


Larch: (n) A tree you might be able to recognise from a long way away.
Lemon Curry: (n) A curry made from lemons
Limey: (n) Slang originally for a British sailor. Now just for an English person.
Llama: (n) The llama is a quadruped which lives in large rivers like the Amazon.  It has two ears, a heart, a forehead, and a beak for eating honey.  It is provided with fins for swimming. Llamas are bigger than frogs. Llamas are very dangerous.
Loony: 1. (adj.) Foolish or stupid. 2. (n) A mad person.
Lumberjack: (n) A person who cuts down trees. They may (or may not) sleep all night, work all day, press wild flowers, wear high heels, suspenders and a bra and hang around in bars.
Lupin: 1. (n) Any of numerous plants of the genus Lupinus in the pea family, having palmately compound leaves and variously colored flowers grouped in spikes or racemes. 

2. (n) A flower that is carried on the Lupin Express and can be stolen by highwaymen to give to the poor.


Mac: (n) See "Mackintosh"
Mackintosh: (n) A waterproof coat
Moose: (n) A type of large deer of the species Alces alces, with large flat horns found in N. America and N. Europe.  Also called Elks. Moose bites can be nasty.


Naughty bits: (n) Parts of the human anatomy, which ought not be referred to in public
Not a Sausage: (phrase) Nothing. No I mean it means “nothing”… oh whatever.


Ocarina: (n) A small terracotta or plastic wind instrument with finger holes, a mouthpiece, and an elongated ovoid shape.

Pepperpot: (n) A Monty Python character - a loud screeching lower middle class woman. (Of course the term arose because the characters, played by the Pythons were "shaped like pepper pots")
Pillock: (n) A stupid or silly person
Pissed: (adj.) Australian\ British slang term for being quite drunk. Something Socrates was said to be.
Piss Off: (phrasal verb) A rather rude way of telling someone to go away.
Plumage: (n) A bird's covering of feathers. Apparently very beautiful on a Norwegian Blue Parrot.
Polecat: (n) A small wild fierce animal that lives in Europe, Asia and N Africa, which has dark brown fur and a strong and unpleasant smell
Pommie: (n) Australian slang meaning an English person.
Pommie bastard: (n) Australian slang for an Englishman (bastard in this case being used affectionately. No really)
Pommieland: (n) Australian slang term for England
Ponce: 1. (n) A man who does not behave, dress or speak in a traditionally male way, esp. one who behaves in a very careful way 

2. (n) Slang term for a male homosexual. 
Poofter\ Pooftah: (n) British slang term for a male homosexual
Pound: 1. (n) the standard unit of money in the UK, Northern Ireland and some other countries. 

2. (n) An imperial unit of weight.
Pram: (n) A baby carriage
PVC-y: (adj.) A word that sound half way between woody and tinny.
Pythonesque: (adj.) [Monty Python's Flying Circus + -esque] after the style of, or resembling the humour of, Monty Python's Flying Circus, a popular British television comedy series that first ran from 1969-1974 and is noted for its absurdist or surrealist humour


Quid: (n) pound – British informal e.g. 1 quid = £1; 1000 quid = £1000.


Semprini: 1. Possibly a rude word (in Monty Python land) 

2.There’s some debate about the real meaning. The general consensus though is that its a type of aftershave.
Shagged Out: (adj.) Worn out, tired

Sheep: (n) Ruminant mammals of the genus Ovis, available in a number of domesticated varieties. Sheep are very dim - once they get an idea into their heads there's no shifting it. There is nothing more dangerous than a clever sheep.
Siamese Bat: (n) They're more dangerous than Siamese Cats don't you know.
Sod: (n) Something or someone considered unpleasant or difficult
Sod It: (interjection) An exclamation of contempt and frustration
Spam: 1. (n) Trademark used for a canned meat product made by Hormel, consisting primarily of pork product 2. (n) Junk e-mail 3. (n) Something served with everything at the Green Midget Café.
Spanish Inquisition: 1. (n) A movement founded in the early years of the sixteenth century, to combat the rising tide of religious unorthodoxy, where the Pope gave Cardinal Ximenez of Spain leave to move without hindrance throughout the land, in a reign of violence, terror and torture. 

2. (n) Three Cardinals whose chief weapon include surprise, fear, ruthless efficiency, an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope and nice red uniforms (oh damn!) 

3. (n) Something NOBODY expects
Spank: (v) Slap with the flat of the hand.
Spanking: (n) A favoured punishment at the Castle Anthrax for setting light to Grail shaped beacons. See "Spank".
Spiny Norman: (n) Giant hedgehog reportedly ranging from twelve feet to eight hundred yards long
Splunge: (adv.) A great-idea-but-possibly-not-and-I'm-not-being-indecisive!
Strewth: (interjection) Used to express surprise or disappointment
Stroppy: 1. (n) Belligerent, touchy, hostile 

2. (n) Something lions are less of after dark.


Tinny: (adj.) A word that (possibly) sounds like metal being hit.
Train spotting: (n) Pretty much what it sounds like – trying to spot trains to record their numbers.
Train spotter: (n) Someone who engages in Train Spotting.
Twit: (n) A fool, an idiot, a stupid person.


Upperclass twit: (n) A member of the upper social classes, with no sort of sensory apparatus or intelligence at all. Tend to wear tweed, will have been to one of the really posh Private schools e.g. Eton or Harrow, may have served in the Guards and may work as a stockbroker or a waste paper basket. Compete in the Upperclass Twit of the Year Show.


Wains Cotting: (n) A little Dorset village (honest – ask the Council rat catcher)
Wainscoting: (n) Wooden panels used to line the walls of a room.
Wanker: (n) A very stupid, unpleasant or useless person, usually a man.
Woody: (adj.) If a tinny word sounds like metal being hit, a woody word must sound like, well, wood being hit.


Ypres: (n) A city of western Belgium near the French border south of Ostend. It was the site of three major World War I battles (1914, 1915, and 1917).





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