WHICKER ISLAND
 

A stock shot of a jet landing which they always use to introduce 'Whicker's World'. This leads us into Whicker Island - a tropical island paradise where all the inhabitants have Alan Whicker suits, glasses and microphones.   Whicker's World

    

Caption: 'WHICKER'S WORLD'   

   

Various Whickers pace past the camera.   

    

First Whicker: (E.I.) Today we look at a vanishing race. A problem people who are fast disappearing off the face of the earth.   

    

Second Whicker: (T.J.) A race who one might say are losing a winning battle.   

    

Third Whicker: (M.P.) They live in a sunshine paradise, a Caribbean dream, where only reality is missing.   

    

Fourth Whicker: (G.C.) For this is Whicker Island.   

    

Fifth Whicker: (J.C.) An island inhabited entirely by ex-international interviewers in pursuit of the impossible dream.   

    

First Whicker: The whole problem of Whicker Island is here in a nutshell.   

    

Second Whicker: There are just too many Whickers.   

    

Third Whicker: The light weight suits.   

    

Fourth Whicker: The old school tie.   

    

Fifth Whicker: The practised voice of the seasoned campaigner.   

    

First Whicker: Cannot hide the basic tragedy here.   

    

Second Whicker: There just aren't enough rich people left to interview.   

   

Cut to a different location.   Whicker Island

    

Third Whicker: You can't teach an old dog new tricks and so (turning to a swimming pool with lots of Whickers around it, wandering with stick mikes and muttering) you find them...   

    

Fourth Whicker: (seated by swimming pool) Sitting beside elegant swimming pools...   

    

Fifth Whicker: (seated at drinks table, with sun umbrella) ... sipping Martinis...   

    

First Whicker: (standing by the pool)... and waiting for the inevitable interview.   

    

Second Whicker: (standing fully clothed in the pool) I talked to the island's only white man, Father Pierre.   

   

Cut to a different location. Feeling of heat. The third Whicker stands beside a priest in a white robe.   

    

Third Whicker: Father Pierre, why did you stay on in this colonial Campari-land where the clink of glasses mingles with the murmur of a million mosquitoes, where waterfalls of whisky wash away the worries of a world-weary Whicker, where gin and tonic jingle in a gyroscopic jubilee of something beginning with J - Father Pierre, why did you stay on here?   

    

Father Pierre: (G.C.) (putting on a pair of Whicker-style glasses) Well mainly for the interviews.   

    

Fifth Whicker: Well there you have it, a crumbling...   Whicker and Father Pierre

    

First Whicker: ... empire in the sun-drenched...   

    

Second Whicker: Caribbean, where the clichés sparkle on the waters...   

    

Third Whicker: ... like the music of repeat fees...   

    

First Whicker: And so...   

    

Fifth Whicker: ... from Whicker Island...   

    

First Whicker: ... it's...   

    

Second Whicker: ... fare...   

    

Third Whicker: ... well and...   

    

Fourth Whicker: ... bon...   

    

Fifth Whicker:  ... voy...   

    

First Whicker: ... age.   

   

Cut to film of Whicker plane taking off. Roll credits, which read:   

   

WHICKER'S WORLD WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY   

    

ALAN WHICKER   

JOHN CLEESE WHICKER   

GRAHAM WHICKER CHAPMAN   

ALAN MICHAEL PALIN WHICKER   

ERIC WHICKER WHICKER IDLE   

TERRY TERRY WHICKER ALAN GILLIAM   

    

ALSO APPEARING   

     

ALAN WHICKER   

MRS IDLE   

CONNIE WHICKER BOOTH   

RITA WHICKER DAVIES   

NIGEL WHICKER JONES   

FRANK WILLIAMS AS THE BOY WHICKER   

MAKE UP ALAN WHICKER AND MADELAINE GAFFNEY   

ALAN WHICKER COSTUMES HAZEL PETHIG   

ANIMATIONS BY TERRY WHICKER GILLIAM   

MR WHICKER KINDLY PHOTOGRAPHED ON FILM BY ALAN FEATHERSTONE   

EDITED ON FILM BY RAY MILLICHOPE   

MR WHICKER'S SOUND BY ALAN WHICKER, ALAN WHICKER AND RICHARD CHUBB   

MR WHICKER WAS ENTIRELY LIT BY JIMMY PURDIE (ASSISTED BY ALAN WHICKER)   

MR WHICKER WAS DESIGNED BY ROBERT BERK   

PRODUCED BY ALAN WHICKER OH, AND IAN MCNAUGHTON   

A BBC WHICKER COLOUR PRODUCTION     

   

   

Just who was Whicker?  

   
 
          

 Back to Season 3 index