Little List song

From the 1987 Jonathan Miller production of "The Mikado" starring Eric Idle

   

Historical notes: The original "Little List Song" from "The Mikado" by Gilbert and Sullivan has long been acknowledged as fairly dated. So when Eric Idle starred in a production by the English National Opera,, he rewrote the lyrics of the song to include topical references. Hence the song could (and did) change from night to night. This is just one version of the updated song:

   

As some days may happenEric Idle as "Ko-Ko" in The Mikado
That a victim must be found
I've got a little list
I've got a little list
Of society offenders
Who might well be underground
And never would be missed
They never would be missed
  

There's weightlifters and bodybuilders
People of that sort
Bank robbers who retire to spend
The minute they get caught
Bishops who don't believe in God
Chief constables who do
All people who host chat shows
And the guests who's on them too
And customs men who fumbling through your underwear insist
I don't think they'd be missed
I'm sure they'd not be missed
   

Chorus: He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And then none of them be missed
And none of them be missed
  

There's the people with pretentious names
Like Justin, Trish, and Rob
And the gynaecologist
I've got him on the list
All muggers, joggers, buggers, floggers
People who play golf
They never would be missed
They never would be missed
   

All waitresses who make you wait
Accountants of all kinds
And actresses who kiss and tell
And wiggle their behinds
And pouncy little singers who to entertain us try
By dressing up like women and by singing far too high
And who on close observance must be either stoned or pissed
I don't think they'd be missed
I'm sure they not be missed
   

Chorus: He's got them on the list
He's got them on the list
And then none of them be missed
And none of them be missed
    

There's the beggars who write letters
From the inland revenue
And the gossip columnist
I've got him on the list
All critics and comedians and opera singers too
And none of them be missed
And none of them be missed
    

All traffic wardens, bankers,
Men who sell Venetian blinds
All advertising chappies
And Australians of all kinds
And nasty little editors whose papers are the pits
Who fill their rags with gossip
And huge and floppy... ritz.
And girls who sell the stories
Of the Tories they have kissed
But you must have got the gist
'Cause none of them be missed
    

Chorus: You may put them on the list
You may put them on the list
And then none of them be missed
And none of them be missed

   

   

Original song by: Gilbert and Sullivan

New lyrics by: Eric Idle

  

   

 

 

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